Friday, February 09, 2007

Life is but a haze

I dont know what it is. I have been in a funk for a couple of weeks now. Ever since school started I havn't felt he want/ drive to do aything. I was the same way back in october. That lasted for around a month. Sometimes my day repeats itself for 3 or 4 days in a row. I go to school, come home, do some homework, watch the news and then go to sleep. Or after I go to school, I go to work, then home, watch the news and go to sleep. On the weekends I am usually working. In the evening I call some of my buddies up but they are either working or gone already. I wasn't usually like this. When I went to Inver Hills Community College I was a lot happier. I was in some classes with other kids previous and so I had friends there. At the U of M there are just huge mongrel hordes of people. I talk to a few people there.
I tried calling my buddy Jon earlier this week and left a voicemail. That was fine, I was on a break from work and decided to give him a buzz. Tonight he call's me up and asks me if I want to go with him to a bar in Castle rock where one of his work friends is playing. I told him I really want to but cant. I have to work on one of my history papers that's due next tuesday. So i'm stuck until next weekend to do something fun with him.
Im the type of person that is nostalgic. I look into my past, like high school for instance, and see all the fun I had with my friends there. After high school I went to college and the rest of my friends went to work. So when my friends want to do something I usually have to do school work. I guess I try to hold on to what I once had. But I know I can't because that period is overwith. dad is always working, one brother is at another college, other one is in high school, my mom works nights and sleeps days. All that and the fact I dont ever have any money to do anything. My job I use to like going to. Now I go there and cant wait until I am done. I just go to the back and do returns for a good portion of the night. The one good thing I have to look forward to is my springbreak. I am going to take a mini-road trip up north, go see Grand Marais, Gooseberry Falls, and other places. Thats still 4 weeks away, so I'll hang in there. After spring break it's only another 6-8 weeks until summer break. Okay I really have to get back to my paper.